Perfect...

In Oscar Wilde’s only published novel “The picture of Dorian Gray”, the protagonist decides not to put his best work of art on display, because he is afraid that he has put too much of himself into it. And thus, is against the proposition of putting himself before the lewd and cynical eye of the public at large. When I first read this book, a couple of years back, I doubted the merits of such an act. After all, it is a dream of any artist to paint his magnum opus; that one stroke that defines his stroke of genius. But now that I’ve thankfully matured into a greater and more profound level of understanding, I can quite see the reasons behind such an act of denouncement.

All our lives, we strive for perfection. A state where we are at peace with ourselves; a state of self-actualization. A vast majority of us are blessed with the destiny of not attaining this perfection. Thanks to all the worldly pressures, pleasures and distractions. But then, there are an unfortunate few who stumble upon this stage, even if inadvertently. Now, that you have achieved perfection, what next? Where does one go from here? It is like a darkness that surrounds our eyes just after we finish a 200m dash. Only this time, this darkness is more perpetual.

I should add here that I’m not contemplating something that is completely abstruse and relegated to the realms of arts and humanities. This is something that we all know and practice throughout our lives; in all forms of public domain. When a person joins a sales department, he is warned not to show that much zeal and efficiency in the very beginning, because the sales target are, by definition, unattainable. It is said that the more you achieve, more is expected of you in the next quarter. And who could forget the famous Hawthorne effect? In this ground breaking study conducted in early 1930s, it was found that the gangs of workers were deliberately under-performing under an impression that if they finish the work before time then they will become obsolete that sooner.

I, as a matter of fact, am quite far from the level of perfection that I’ve set for myself. But I’m quite aware of the fact that I may stumble upon it sooner than I plan to. But here lies the clincher, I plan to.... after all what is life without a little bit of a death-wish?

Rambling inconsequentially...

I seem to have seceded into a strange sense of restlessness. A restlessness where I am in equal anticipation of things to happen... And also afraid, that they might... A restlessness, where everything matters and, yet, nothing does.... What am I waiting for? What is it that still eludes me? Why is it that the more I try to stay calm and go to sleep, more I see my legs shaking to a subliminal vibe? And last, but perhaps more importantly.... Why am I even bothering to ask such questions? I don’t think I even care to know what the answer might be.

How does one know where one stands if one doesn’t know where one started or how long one has travelled? Why is it important to know where one stands? Because the place of one’s existence in life, is unique. No two beings can exist at a same place at the same time. So where one is; is of no consequence to anyone else. It is only sick to seek gratification by trying to know more about something about which no one would be interested in knowing and even if they did, would be plainly unfathomable to understand.

For example, why am I rambling like this? What is it that is bothering me? Is there anything at all that is really bothering me? Why am I making my life miserable by constructing such long complex sentences and trying to join them together using a myriad labyrinth of punctuation marks? A strange fight to beat those frustrating green wavy lines of MS Word which remind me that man-made algorithms are better at a language, which man has perfected long before its very existence. Would you understand? And more importantly, would you care?

Plagiarised Originality

It has been quite a while since my last post on this blog. Strangely enough, I don’t have anything to say even now! It is so difficult to say anything original nowadays. As if everything that could be said about anything on earth, has already been said.

Come to think of it; what originality is actually left? Our thinking is predominantly based on what we have learnt, what we have learnt, is predominantly based on the experiences of other people or from books written by someone else, regarding life as they saw it. We know that red is red, because we are taught that it is “red”. What difference would it have made had one learnt to call red as orange from the very beginning of life?

Even in terms of everyday life, we end up doing what someone else has already done. I accept the fact that we end up doing it in our own special way, but there is nothing radical in it, is there? We end up filling into our boss’s shoes, we end up fulfilling the dreams of our parents... the dreams that they must have seen after seeing someone else live it.... we become husbands and wives and try to emulate the happiness and behavior of husbands and wives around us.... husbands and wives who are probably doing the same thing. Our homes either take a leaf out of Gothic, Rajasthani, Mughal or South Indian style of architecture; and even when we ‘try to break away from the rut’, we end up copying some vague modernistic design! Even, our radicalism is a product of inheritance!

I do not propose to start a movement wherein we break all the set rules and barriers and make something new... a new order..... sounds familiar?.... that was Communism, a hundred years back!... My point is... in spite of doing what someone else has already done.... we don’t seem to do it any better, do we?... so instead of setting a new world order, why not set this world into order based on what we already know or do?

Think.... Cerebrate....

Second Chances

An egalitarian would like to believe that we are all born equal with similar capabilities, strengths and weaknesses and hence, deserve to live in an equal society. But I've always begged to differ. After all, history has proved that equality has never been Man's forte. Man has always survived and flourished in a society segregated on the basis of caste, religion, gender or race. I have to admit to admit that Men are born unequal.

You see a Prince Harry or Prince William enjoying royalty in their early twenties, you see a Raphael Nadal sizing up to the brilliance of Roger Federer (case in point, French Open Finals, 2008) when he is hardly twenty, you see Shah Rukh Khan running after trains in Europe of DDLJ when he was in his mid- twenties..... and then you see, yours truly, a 35 yr old in the garb of a 22 yr old waiting for middle age to settle in at any time!..... If you care to observe you also see people in their early twenties still grappling with their graduations.... and the unfortunate many, who dont even get a chance to go that far in life.... It is tough to imagine that we were all born in the same earth in the era of 1985-1988 and yet we have all become so different from one another....

Psychology has long tried to settle the fight between innate capabilities and the impact of environment on personality development... the battle of Nature vs Nurture.... Some believe that we are already what we are destined to become, by the time we are born.... why still others believe that the environment we group up in has a louder say in how we eventually turn out to be.... But it has never been a case of either-or..... its always 'and'..... the circumstances under which we take birth and the environment that nourishes us.... both are equally important....
There is something to learn here too.... you see, if both these things are equally important then this automatically proves that nature by default has given Man a life line.... you see, if success is 100 then Nature and Nurture would be 50-50 each.... hence, even if one gets an unfair deal in one, he can always try and compensate for it in other.... so if you got on 20/50 in the birth stage of life, make sure that you get 50 in the growth stage of life.... If we carry this logic forward than it defeats the whole caste system on which our society has flourished so far..... Birth may be a water-tight demarcation.... it may brand you as a caste, sub-caste or sect for the rest of your life.... but you still have the nourishment.... you can still learn from the environment.... because environment is still equal for everybody....

And all this time, I thought that life never gave a second chance....

The Maximum City

I recently finished reading Suketu Mehta's "Maximum City"... I must admit that I read it, not to learn anything new about this wonderful city of Mumbai... but to reiterate my faith in its beauty..

Mumbai has everything going against it... It is bursting at its seams due to a dangerous heady cocktail of Pollution and Population... There seems to be a rather "parochial" (I dunno who quoted this word first, but the media has been lapping it up and regurgitating it again and again.. and I suspect if many users actually even know what it means).... so where were we??.... ah yes... there seems to a rather parochial tension flowing underneath the fabric of the society... Mumbai invites many, It cant handle any... It has a lot of money to flaunt, but none to give...

So what is so great about this city?? why is it that inspite of being reminded about the grim realities, a farmer leaves his acres and settles here in square foots?.... Why is it that inspite of all the complaints, nobody ever says that enough is enough... why doesn't anyone want to leave this city?...

Every person who lives in this city has his or her own reason for being here... so in a way, Mumbai is a city of close to 15 million reasons... some come here to satisfy their needs, some to satiate their greeds... some have nowhere else to go, while some have everything here...Mumbai shows a hope and a dream to everyone who comes in.... Contrary to what some "popular" parochial (there, i used it again!!) leaders might want to think, I find Mumbai to be one of the least biased cities in India.... I have seen Mumbai give a fair chance to whoever is willing to work... irrespective of caste, creed, religion or even nationality.....

If you look at it careful, there is not much difference between Mumbai and any other city in India... they have common problems of slums, poverty, dirt, pollution, electricity, water, roads, roaches and politician (the last two can be used interchangeably).... the difference lies in perception... while other cities with all their incongruences, give a sense of despair... Mumbai, with all its limitations, still manages to shine a ray of hope... a person walking on the street (quite literally, because the sidewalk is probably dug up!) will look at all the Audi, the Mercs and the BMWs and will feel invigorated... He'll try to go an extra mile so that if not the Merc, at least he makes enough to afford a BEST which would at least take him off the road....

Mumbai is a cruel place... and hence, it is safer.... it robs you off all your ignorance and innocense and makes you street smart... Here, you fight against the criminals, by having a criminal streak of mind... women are safer, because they know how to fight, and know how and which expletives to use on whom....

Mumbai, as a city, is greater than the combination of all the people who inhabit it.... Mumbai is the summation of their aspirations.... aspirations, which are not quantifiable.... Mumbai cannot be the domain of a few... It is as much of the poor, as it is for the rich.... I thank Mr. Mehta for giving it the sobriquet of "Maximum City"...... It has a maximum of heaven and hell, on offer... It is up to you as to what you take from it....


P.S.:
Parochial: adjective
Relating to or supported by or located in a parish
Narrowly restricted in outlook or scope